Tuesday, March 02, 2004
Handicapping the Kerry VP candidates....
Hillary Clinton. This would entail Her Highness waiting until 2012 to become Empress, I mean President. There is no way Hillary would want to make her subjects, I mean supporters, wait an extra four years to be ruled, I mean represented, by her. 25-1.
Bill Bradley. I like Bradley, but it's hard to imagine more soporific ticket than Kerry/Bradley. 20-1.
Wesley Clark: An empty resume and a terrible campaigner. Republicans would love to follow him around with his former commanding officer Hugh Shelton to remind everyone of those "character issues" that Shelton has been talking about the last six months. 10-1.
Dick Gephardt: The voting public doesn't respond to him at all. 10-1.
Bob Graham. He makes the ticket much tougher to beat in Florida, but he's slightly loopy. I can't see Kerry taking the risk that Graham will say something bizarre on the campaign trail. 7-1.
John Edwards: I don't think so. A number of "Kerry cool to Edwards" pieces have been leaked to the press lately, so that's not a good sign for this ticket. Edwards is likeable but shallow ("A male flight attendant" says Craig Kilborn). In a debate with Dick Cheney he would look like a little kid wearing his father's clothes. 5-1.
Max Cleland: Makes it an "all-Vietnam" ticket that can trash Bush on the war 24-7 if it wanted to, which seems to be attractive to Kerry. I'm pretty sure that constant living in the past would spell doom, and I think the Democrats would have to know this. 4-1.
Gov. Bill Richardson, New Mexico: A safe candidate who would balance Kerry's patrician snobbiness. But he was humiliated by his friends the Clintons in that Monica Lewinsky UN debacle. 3-1.
Hillary Clinton. This would entail Her Highness waiting until 2012 to become Empress, I mean President. There is no way Hillary would want to make her subjects, I mean supporters, wait an extra four years to be ruled, I mean represented, by her. 25-1.
Bill Bradley. I like Bradley, but it's hard to imagine more soporific ticket than Kerry/Bradley. 20-1.
Wesley Clark: An empty resume and a terrible campaigner. Republicans would love to follow him around with his former commanding officer Hugh Shelton to remind everyone of those "character issues" that Shelton has been talking about the last six months. 10-1.
Dick Gephardt: The voting public doesn't respond to him at all. 10-1.
Bob Graham. He makes the ticket much tougher to beat in Florida, but he's slightly loopy. I can't see Kerry taking the risk that Graham will say something bizarre on the campaign trail. 7-1.
John Edwards: I don't think so. A number of "Kerry cool to Edwards" pieces have been leaked to the press lately, so that's not a good sign for this ticket. Edwards is likeable but shallow ("A male flight attendant" says Craig Kilborn). In a debate with Dick Cheney he would look like a little kid wearing his father's clothes. 5-1.
Max Cleland: Makes it an "all-Vietnam" ticket that can trash Bush on the war 24-7 if it wanted to, which seems to be attractive to Kerry. I'm pretty sure that constant living in the past would spell doom, and I think the Democrats would have to know this. 4-1.
Gov. Bill Richardson, New Mexico: A safe candidate who would balance Kerry's patrician snobbiness. But he was humiliated by his friends the Clintons in that Monica Lewinsky UN debacle. 3-1.
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